Rock and Roll Screams Come True
Voodoo, Metal, and Traci Lords in Shock 'Em Dead
Shock ‘Em Dead, though released in 1991, is very much a film from the 1980s. It was released in January of that year. Roughly nine months later, in September, Nirvana’s Nevermind was released. It’s not entirely fair to say that Nevermind killed glam metal by launching grunge into the mainstream consciousness, but it was certainly the most devastating blow. Remnants of glam metal would continue to prance and preen through the ‘90s, but the party was pretty much over, and metal became something darker and harder, led by no-fun groups such as Alice in Chains that existed with one foot in metal and the other in a grunge sensibility, and heavier, no-nonsense outfits like Metallica.
Shock 'Em Dead is a reasonably fun curio from the waning days of glam metal. It’s the old Faust story again, but this time about Angel Martin (Stephen Quadros), a hopelessly square pizza shop employee who makes a deal with a local voodoo priestess to become the greatest metal guitarist the world has ever seen, all so he can get into a band that is so bad I assumed they would be the ones making a bargain with the devil. After Angel makes his pact in a scene that is equal parts one of the hallucination scenes from The Mask (1961) and the video to Alice Cooper’s “Welcome to My Nightmare” (the version with the dancing gorilla and snake people), he wakes up in a mansion with a trio of scantily-clad groupies by his side. Oh, and he can shred now (Quadros’ guitar-playing double was Michael Angelo Batio, a member of LA metal band Nitro who became famous for his double guitar, which does indeed make an appearance in Shock ‘Em Dead).
But of course, all Faustian bargains come with a catch. Angel discovers that human food and drink has become poison to him, and to maintain his demonic power he must occasionally kill people and suck out their soul. Armed with his new skills, he struts down to the local rehearsal space to seize his place in that awful band that initially rejected him. And it turns out that the corrupting power of voodoo wishes is nothing compared to the corrupting power of fame and heavy metal glory.
Shock ‘Em Dead isn’t very good, but it’s also not so bad that it doesn’t know how to entertain. It moves quickly (despite some rock and roll filler) and boasts a decent sense of humor. When Angel awakens after making his deal, he’s still the same awkward idiot he was the day before, only now he’s in spandex, eyeliner, and a wig of giant heavy metal hair. Markus Grupa as Jonny, the lead singer of Spastik Kolon, also turns in a wildly over-the-top performance, all posturing and sporting skintight half-shirts and leg warmers and giving off a very “Johnny Slash from Square Pegs” vibe with a dash of Mick Jagger. He’s quite possibly the movie’s MVP and seems like he might have been much happier in a Kajagoogoo-style new wave act. The movie’s finale, in which an insane Angel tries to murder the band’s manager, Lindsay (Traci Lords), while another band cheers the scene on, thinking it’s part of a stage show, is good for a laugh.
Neither Angel nor his trio of groupies (Karen Russell, Gina Parks, and Laurel Wiley) are good at being hell-spawned demon people. They botch murder after murder and can’t seem to orchestrate an ambush that doesn’t leave ample opportunity for the intended victim to make an escape. They’re at their best in these moments, since the film isn’t really good at, nor particularly interested in, being scary. It also serves up its fair share of (possibly) unintentional humor, mostly via stilted performances and awkward expository dialogue (“Hey, look, it’s that old voodoo lady…”).
Traci Lords is front and center in the film’s marketing, if not in the film itself. She’s relegated largely to damsel in distress. She was early in her efforts to launch a more mainstream movie career, and after Not of This Earth (1990) and John Waters’ mainstreamish Crybaby (1988) starring Johnny Depp, Shock ‘Em Dead is a step backward. She’s uneven in Shock 'Em Dead. Some moments she’s wooden and in others, she showcases talent and charisma. It’s not like the screenplay by Andrew Cross, Mark Freed (who also directed), and Dave Tedder (none of whom sustained a film career much beyond this film) gives Traci a lot to work with. However, she would soon find a home at direct-to-video action film company PM Entertainment, which was willing to give her lead roles. If she didn’t quite achieve mainstream stardom, she at least worked regularly—not to mention finding time to make a decent name for herself in techno music. I guess Shock ‘Em Dead put her off glam metal.